Here's a little video I made to put to a song I wrote while I was in the MTC called He's Been There. I'm grateful for my Savior and all he has done for me...and in spite of me!
He's Been There
Here's the story that inspired me to write the lyrics to "He's Been There." I was called in January 2005 to the Belgium Brussels/Netherlands mission, and reported then to the MTC. I was struggling at the time with learning Dutch, and sometimes felt like I didn't deserve help learning the language because I wasn't the perfect missionary. I wrote the lyrics based on Chieko Okazaki's quote (at the bottom of this post) that I got in my Young Women class when I was about 14...and based on my experience in the MTC. This is one of the only times that I felt like the lyrics came simply and powerfully to me.
I wrote the music back in 2004 when I was at BYU-Idaho for an Old Testament class project (originally the lyrics were in narrative form about people in the Old Testament-- Eve, Noah, Joseph, etc. It was pretty dorky sounding!), and the current lyrics when I was in the MTC back in January of 2005, and it's funny how naturally the lyrics came. I have written music my whole life, and when I attempt to write lyrics, I fall flat on my face (figuratively speaking, of course :-P ). Writing music has always come naturally, but lyric-writing in particular has never been my forte (Get it? "Forte?" Haha!). It was definitely a gift.
The quote has made me think a lot my view of the atonement ever since. I love it. I feel like it conveys a powerful message. We usually summarize the atonement by saying, "We are imperfect, so we need a Savior." or "Imperfect people need a Savior." So I love how Chieko Okazaki takes a different approach by stating its opposite: "Perfect people do not need a Savior." Isn't it funny how a restatement of a phrase we've heard a million times makes us rethink things? I love it!
That's what I hope to get across with this song: the Atonement works for you on a personal level because we wouldn't need Him if we were perfect! I wanted to convey this in the video by showing the empty tomb during the line "He is there" to perhaps show the irony in it all: that it is because He's actually not there in His tomb, that He can be there for us now. I included a couple of paintings in the slideshow showing the sacrament because I wanted to show that through partaking of the sacrament, "He is there" for us -- meaning His spiritual presence (the Holy Ghost) -- until one day we gain access to his temporal presence and can see him face to face ("at last I'll see Him face to face, this ransomed child to claim").
Chieko N. Okazaki, Lighten Up!, pp. 174-175:
"We know that on some level Jesus experienced the totality of mortal existence in Gethsemane. It's our faith that he experienced everything - absolutely everything. Sometimes we don't think through the implications of that belief. We talk in great generalities about the sins of all humankind, about the suffering of the entire human family. But we don't experience pain in generalities. We experience it individually. That mean Jesus knows what it felt like when your mother died of cancer - how it was for your mother, how it still is for you. He knows what it felt like to lose the student body election. He knows that moment when the brakes locked, and the car started to skid. He experienced the slave ship sailing from Ghana toward Virginia. He experienced napalm in Vietnam. He knows about drug addiction and alcoholism.
"There is nothing you have experienced as a woman that he does not also know and recognize. On a profound level, he understands about pregnancy and giving birth. He knows about PMS and cramps and menopause. He understands about rape and infertility and abortion.
"His last recorded words to his disciples were, "And, lo, I am with you always, even unto the end of the world." (Matthew 28:20.) What does that mean? It means he understands your mother-pain when your five-year-old leaves for kindergarten, when a bully picks on your fifth-grader, when your daughter calls to say that the new baby has Down's syndrome. He knows your mother-rage when a trusted babysitter sexually abuses your two-year-old, when someone gives your thirteen-year-old drugs, when someone seduces your seventeen-year-old. He knows the pain you live with when you come home to a quite apartment where the only children who ever come are visitors, when you hear that your former husband and his new wife were sealed in the temple last week, when your fiftieth wedding anniversary rolls around and your husband has been dead for two years. He knows all that. He's been there. He's been lower than all that.
"He's not waiting for us to be perfect. Perfect people don't need a Savior. He came to save us in our imperfections. He is the Lord of the living, and the living make mistakes. He's not embarrassed by us, angry at us, or shocked. He wants us in our brokenness, in our unhappiness, in our guilt and our grief."
Boyd K. Packer, Acting President of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles, Special Witnesses of Christ DVD
"In the Gethsemanes of life which we all have, and often in my present calling, I have gone to my knees with a humble spirit to the only place I could for help. I often went in agony of spirit, earnestly pleading with God to sustain me in the work I have come to appreciate more than life itself. I have, on occasion, felt a terrible aloneness of the wounds of the heart, of the sweet agony, the buffetings of Satan, and the encircling warm comfort of the Spirit of the Master.
"I have also felt the crushing burden, the self-doubts of inadequacy and unworthiness, the fleeting feeling of being forsaken, then of being reinforced an hundredfold. I have climbed a spiritual Mount Sinai dozens of times, seeking to communicate and to receive instructions. It has been as though I have struggled up an almost real Mount of Transfiguration and, upon occasion, felt great strength and power in the presence of the Divine. A special, sacred feeling has been a sustaining influence and often a close companion."
Have a happy Easter!
Friday, April 22, 2011
Saturday, April 16, 2011
Samuel Nathan
Here are some pics of little Sam. These are the ones from Bella Baby, so if you looked at the link last post, then you've seen these. We'll have more pictures coming in a few weeks, too. Our friend is a photographer and took baby pictures of Sam, so as soon as we get those, we'll post them.
We love this boy. He's so sweet. He's so docile, too. He only cries if he hasn't eaten in a very long time. At the hospital, he would go for 6 hours without eating -- and the nurses would have to bring him in to feed because he just wouldn't cry.
Unfortunately he doesn't go for that long at home now...especially at night. :) He has the sweetest little "cry." He kind of squeaks. It makes me smile every time!
I've been initiated into the "I'm-a-mom-of-a-son" club. Yesterday, I get pegged twice in one changing! Girls are much easier to change than boys I've decided. Now, everytime I change his diaper, I find I get really anxious. Maybe it's a good thing though; I change it twice as fast as I would have otherwise!
Avery has decided that she will crawl out of her crib when she doesn't want to be in it. That has been making nap time and bed time very difficult. It'd be nice if we could just shut the door to her room, but because we've had parents from both sides staying over, we've had to rearrange the rooming situation, which means that she has been in the family room in the basement. That means no doors to close! We just sit there next to her crib for an hour (or two), and make sure she stays in. Not fun. Any suggestions on how to make her stay in her crib? We've tried having her put her doll and bunny to sleep first by tucking them in, piling blankets on her to make her warm and sleepy, singing, time out each time she crawls out, etc. I think we're out of ideas, and I need her to take naps....so that I can!
Avery has been very loving with Sam. She calls him "Sa" or "Sammy." She loves to "help" change his diaper, put his pacifier in his mouth (and in her mouth), burp him, show me where his eye is by poking it, and tell me that his diaper is poopy. There have been the occasional frustrating times when she'll decided to do something naughty (like climb up on top of the grand piano) and I can't get to her right away, but luckily those events are usually few and far between. It's fun to see her give him kisses and hugs. We also are glad because we felt it was time to give her a sibling...She'll benefit from learning how to share!
My visiting teachers have been great, too! They've brought/will be bringing 3 meals over the next week. That has been sooo helpful! I really have forgotten how much time a baby takes up! I was trying to remember at what point it becomes a little easier. I remember when Avery could hold her bottle, that was a huge milestone. And when we didn't really have to burp her anymore, that was equally as helpful.
We're planning on having Sam blessed in church on the first Sunday in May, so consider yourself invited.
The past two nights, Nathan has taken care of Sam until 6:00 am!!! He never woke me up for my shift. He's been on spring break for this week, and he said that he wanted to take Sam as much as he could now because he wouldn't be able to do it later. I feel so bad because he's probably so tired, but it also makes me want to pinch his cute little cheeks. I love Nathan -- he's been so supportive. He's always asking, "What would you like me to do?" After he finishes that task, he'll come back and ask me again what else he can do to help. That's how he's always been. What a great guy. I'm so lucky!
One great thing about knowing that we'll be moving to AZ is that clothes shopping is much, much easier. I only need to buy clothes for one season: summer. That makes shopping much more simple! I don't have to calculate how old Sam or Avery will be in 6 months to find out if the outfit I want to get them will be in season! It's great!
Things for Yuma are slowly falling in to place. Thank goodness we've had so much time to prepare. There's a lot more paperwork to fill out for a job as an independent contractor than if Nathan would be working for someone. That's what I do during the days: fill out paperwork!
Well, Sam's hungry again. I can hear him grunting and squeaking!
We love this boy. He's so sweet. He's so docile, too. He only cries if he hasn't eaten in a very long time. At the hospital, he would go for 6 hours without eating -- and the nurses would have to bring him in to feed because he just wouldn't cry.
Unfortunately he doesn't go for that long at home now...especially at night. :) He has the sweetest little "cry." He kind of squeaks. It makes me smile every time!
I've been initiated into the "I'm-a-mom-of-a-son" club. Yesterday, I get pegged twice in one changing! Girls are much easier to change than boys I've decided. Now, everytime I change his diaper, I find I get really anxious. Maybe it's a good thing though; I change it twice as fast as I would have otherwise!
Avery has decided that she will crawl out of her crib when she doesn't want to be in it. That has been making nap time and bed time very difficult. It'd be nice if we could just shut the door to her room, but because we've had parents from both sides staying over, we've had to rearrange the rooming situation, which means that she has been in the family room in the basement. That means no doors to close! We just sit there next to her crib for an hour (or two), and make sure she stays in. Not fun. Any suggestions on how to make her stay in her crib? We've tried having her put her doll and bunny to sleep first by tucking them in, piling blankets on her to make her warm and sleepy, singing, time out each time she crawls out, etc. I think we're out of ideas, and I need her to take naps....so that I can!
Avery has been very loving with Sam. She calls him "Sa" or "Sammy." She loves to "help" change his diaper, put his pacifier in his mouth (and in her mouth), burp him, show me where his eye is by poking it, and tell me that his diaper is poopy. There have been the occasional frustrating times when she'll decided to do something naughty (like climb up on top of the grand piano) and I can't get to her right away, but luckily those events are usually few and far between. It's fun to see her give him kisses and hugs. We also are glad because we felt it was time to give her a sibling...She'll benefit from learning how to share!
My visiting teachers have been great, too! They've brought/will be bringing 3 meals over the next week. That has been sooo helpful! I really have forgotten how much time a baby takes up! I was trying to remember at what point it becomes a little easier. I remember when Avery could hold her bottle, that was a huge milestone. And when we didn't really have to burp her anymore, that was equally as helpful.
We're planning on having Sam blessed in church on the first Sunday in May, so consider yourself invited.
The past two nights, Nathan has taken care of Sam until 6:00 am!!! He never woke me up for my shift. He's been on spring break for this week, and he said that he wanted to take Sam as much as he could now because he wouldn't be able to do it later. I feel so bad because he's probably so tired, but it also makes me want to pinch his cute little cheeks. I love Nathan -- he's been so supportive. He's always asking, "What would you like me to do?" After he finishes that task, he'll come back and ask me again what else he can do to help. That's how he's always been. What a great guy. I'm so lucky!
One great thing about knowing that we'll be moving to AZ is that clothes shopping is much, much easier. I only need to buy clothes for one season: summer. That makes shopping much more simple! I don't have to calculate how old Sam or Avery will be in 6 months to find out if the outfit I want to get them will be in season! It's great!
Things for Yuma are slowly falling in to place. Thank goodness we've had so much time to prepare. There's a lot more paperwork to fill out for a job as an independent contractor than if Nathan would be working for someone. That's what I do during the days: fill out paperwork!
Well, Sam's hungry again. I can hear him grunting and squeaking!
Sunday, April 10, 2011
I Had a Baby!
Yes, that's right! Samuel Nathan Richardson was born on 4/6 (only two days past his due date). He was 7 lbs. 6 oz., and 19 1/2 inches long. To see photos, go to:
http://www.bellababyphotography.com/login
Password: 0406babyboyrichardson
I'll be posting photos on the next post (as I'm a little preoccupied at the moment trying to catch up on some sleep).
The Story
Nathan's alarm went off at 6:15 that morning and I realized I was having contractions. Samuel was nice enough to let me have time to shower and pack a hospital bag and be on our way. He was born a little before noon.
I was able to walk into the hospital, check in, and they gave me an epidural shortly afterward. Gosh, I love those things. I was ready to have him at 10:30 or so, but they let me sit for a while so the baby could descend a little more, and so the pushing would go more quickly...which it did! I only had to push through two contractions and he was out! It was fast and painless. :)
Personalities
He's a cutie. He likes to be awake at night, and take his sweet time feeding, but I really have nothing to complain about as he is healthy and happy!
Avery loves to hold baby. In fact that's her new favorite sentence: "I want to hold/see baby." She loves to help out with everything and has been a great big sister.
Coming Soon
Next on the list of to-do's: get ready for another interfaith dialogue at our house with students from Azusa Pacific University in LA. That'll happen this coming Monday, and I hope to be able to participate, so hopefully Sam's and Avery's schedule allow me to get some conversation time with them! If you haven't heard of what they are, see this post about what dialogues are: Interfaith Dialogues.
Til next post!
http://www.bellababyphotography.com/login
Password: 0406babyboyrichardson
I'll be posting photos on the next post (as I'm a little preoccupied at the moment trying to catch up on some sleep).
The Story
Nathan's alarm went off at 6:15 that morning and I realized I was having contractions. Samuel was nice enough to let me have time to shower and pack a hospital bag and be on our way. He was born a little before noon.
I was able to walk into the hospital, check in, and they gave me an epidural shortly afterward. Gosh, I love those things. I was ready to have him at 10:30 or so, but they let me sit for a while so the baby could descend a little more, and so the pushing would go more quickly...which it did! I only had to push through two contractions and he was out! It was fast and painless. :)
Personalities
He's a cutie. He likes to be awake at night, and take his sweet time feeding, but I really have nothing to complain about as he is healthy and happy!
Avery loves to hold baby. In fact that's her new favorite sentence: "I want to hold/see baby." She loves to help out with everything and has been a great big sister.
Coming Soon
Next on the list of to-do's: get ready for another interfaith dialogue at our house with students from Azusa Pacific University in LA. That'll happen this coming Monday, and I hope to be able to participate, so hopefully Sam's and Avery's schedule allow me to get some conversation time with them! If you haven't heard of what they are, see this post about what dialogues are: Interfaith Dialogues.
Til next post!
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