Mommy-ness

I saw a video online a few weeks ago that made me lose 4 hours of sleep the night I saw it. That's a pretty impressive feat considering I'm tired preggo woman. But let me first make a confession. Bear with me because it'll all tie in in a second.

I'm obsessed with the USWNT (U.S. Women's National Soccer Team). I've been a fan since I was 14. My yahoo e-mail address is named after the former captain of the USWNT who was a mom, and, at least to my understanding, stopped playing so she could focus on raising her children more.

I look forward to the Olympics and the FIFA Women's World Cup to see all these amazing women play their hearts out. My current fav is forward Abby Wambach--one of the best players in the world. Imagine seeing that running full speed at you. All 5'10 of her:




You get the picture though. I love the game and the team!

So anyway, back to the reason why I lost so much sleep! The video I watched was an interview with U.S. Women's National Soccer Team players Kate Markgraf and Christe Rampone, who both had children while they were on the USWNT, and both came back to play.

Here they are -- Kate and Christine in a post-Olympics shot with their kids:


Here's the sound byte that caused my insomnia:

"I think when you still love to do what you want to do, you don't want to let kids get in the way of that or stop you, because you know you'll always look back with regret."
-Kate Markgraf, U.S. Women's National Soccer Team


Basically the message of the video was "don't let children stop you from your career or your "life." [click here to see the video. At 1:19 is where the discussion begins]

So What?
So, what is it about that quote that made me lose sleep?

First off, that quote by Kate is not anything that she and Christine can, as the only moms on the team, uniquely say. All of the other players on the team (married or not) who don't have kids can say the exact same thing: "I'm not letting kids stop me from my career as a soccer player." Every woman on the USWNT could honestly say that.

So what do I think might be a sound-byte more fitting of their unique position as moms? How about Kate's statement reversed? "Don't let your dreams/career/life stop you from having kids." Now that is a position that can be theirs alone to offer. And it's a much better one! How many women today can really claim that having and raising kids was their #1 priority and that's what they devoted their time to? What an honor to be able to say that.

Can't Blame Them
I honestly can't blame any woman for taking the view that kids should come only when you're done doing what you want to do. I was totally on the same page not too long ago. It sounds appealing. Anyone who knew me growing up, or heck, even when I was grown up, knew that I did NOT like kids. I tried to avoid babysitting at all costs. When I was engaged to Nathan I apparently told him that I thought kids were, "puking balls of flesh." He loves telling people that. :) (Now I think that pregnant women fit that description better...)

But, one of the reasons I wanted to start a family was because this world needs good, stalwart, "warriors" to fight off all the immorality and sneaky-but-believable false ideas out there, and help others see them too. Our happiness and our society's stability depends on it.

I used my artistic abilities to show what I want mine and Nathan's little "child-warriors" to be like:

How do you get kids who can discern between the good and the bad? I think parents have more to do with it than we think! I knew that by having Nathan as a dad, my kids would be in good hands. And even though I didn't really like the idea of being a mom, I knew I'd have a good man beside me. At this point, my feelings went something like this:

wife = fun!; mom = slave + ick.

(On a random side note, if I were to solve for "mom" in that last equation, I think it'd be mom - slave - ick = nothing. Hmmm....what does it mean????!)

Well, along came Avery, and that's when it all changed. I still love being a wife, but being a Momma has made being a wife even more enriching than I ever thought possible. So now, it's:

wife = gnarly; mom = super duper cool.

And what could be better than that?

Don't tell Avery that we're raising her to be a "warrior" though because that might give her nightmares. Maybe you can tell her when she's older, like maybe 6.

I am now stepping off my soapbox.